(I was unpacking and found one of my devotionals with this entry. It was interesting to read what I was dealing with back then; not knowing I would be right where I am right now. The kids were 4 and 3 years old at the time. I was hmmm...six years younger ha!)
'There is a lot on my mind today. How am I suppose to get everything done? Here are the things swimming in my head:
1) Recording just one song is taking me hours. I really want to share more of my songs, but I don't have the time. I am embarrassed that I only have three posted on WorshiptheRock.com. Will people get bored listening to them? Are they good or great songs? Will they get tired of listening to me if I don't post anymore songs for awhile? Should I send them in to contests? When will I be able to have guitar recorded on them? Should I wait until Brian can play guitar or ask someone else to do it? Where can I find good drum loops on my keyboard? Should I take a break and focus on my family?
2) Preschool for Josh and Hannah at home. They need to get out and explore. They need to do learning things to keep their attention. Hannah is playing pretend almost all day. It is so hard for her to stop. It's hard for me to devert her attention to do something else. Am I going to loose it and put them in preschool anyway?
3) The house. The laundry is not done. There are dishes needing to be washed in the sink and on the stove. When will I get to mopping the kitchen and bathroom floors? The master bedroom needs serious attention. I need to dust all the cobwebs throughout the house.
4) The garage needs to be organized. Where are all those cute pants I saved for Hannah? Where are the overdue books from the library?
5) Pleasanton, CA. Are we going? Will we rent or buy a house? Will they pay for preschool? Will Brian be happy there? Does God know what He's doing? Of course He does. Why do we have to go there?
6) Finding time to rewrite songs, study the bible.
7) Christmas gifts. There are still people I need to buy for. Why do we spend so much on Christmas?
After reading what I've written I realize I am stressed and worried about the future. God, how do I give these heavy thoughts to you? What will you do with them? Will I fail if I don't get more of my songs out there? God I give You my burdens.'
Tuesday, February 18, 2014
Saturday, January 11, 2014
The Air Is Renewing ~
Today is a day to breathe. Thank you Jesus! Yes, I still had to lock myself in the study to breathe that renewing air; however with my husband's help I am enjoying every minute of my break! I also have a front row seat to watch my children take their handful of doggy do do bags and pick up Molly's land mines in the backyard. ha ha!! I am SOOOO glad our children are old enough to be put to work. I have been waiting YEARS for this day!! lol! All of you young moms out there need to know there is hope.
Yesterday morning I woke up and told God I was not ready for another day of homeschooling the kids. I had lost my inspiration and drive. I did manage to write up a schedule on the board the night before, but I still had to ask God for His help to get me through the day. When I walked into the office, I couldn't believe what I was seeing. Both my kids were doing their school work. Josh had already read from his book out-loud to Hannah, he was working on his handwriting, Hannah was reading her book, and she also did her handwriting. While I was making breakfast, they did their piano practice. Then as I was having my coffee, I gave them their spelling tests, math and english tests. By 11:00am we were done with school!! We all rejoiced! What a gift that was from the Lord.
We celebrated by going to the skate park for an hour. The kids had the park to themselves and Josh taught Hannah a few tricks. They wanted me to try the ramps that were easy for them to do. I got on Hannah's skooter and almost crashed right on my rear end a few times. I couldn't believe how hard those "easy" ramps were. I think my failures inspired Hannah to step out and risk a little bit more since it wasn't her favorite sport to do. ; )
We then had a play day with some public school friends at the park. It was great to see them again. During that time I was on facebook and saw Natalie Grant was offering free tickets to her concert "Dare To Be" to the first 10 people who emailed her. On a whim I emailed her and she actually put two aside for Hannah and I. So, we had a spontaneous mother/daughter date in Sacramento last night! It was wonderful!! Unfortunately, Hannah got car sick and had an accident on the way home. Poor thing. She felt horrible. I told her it wasn't her fault; we cleaned it up at a gas station on the side of the road. I was so thankful that God was watching out for us.
Now I am catching up on Women's Ministry stuff and Music Ministry stuff. = ) Life really is about the journey and not so much about the destination. Or, as I learned from Charlotte Gambill's message; it's how we handle the "middle" part of our lives that will make the biggest impact when we reach the end.
Yesterday morning I woke up and told God I was not ready for another day of homeschooling the kids. I had lost my inspiration and drive. I did manage to write up a schedule on the board the night before, but I still had to ask God for His help to get me through the day. When I walked into the office, I couldn't believe what I was seeing. Both my kids were doing their school work. Josh had already read from his book out-loud to Hannah, he was working on his handwriting, Hannah was reading her book, and she also did her handwriting. While I was making breakfast, they did their piano practice. Then as I was having my coffee, I gave them their spelling tests, math and english tests. By 11:00am we were done with school!! We all rejoiced! What a gift that was from the Lord.
We celebrated by going to the skate park for an hour. The kids had the park to themselves and Josh taught Hannah a few tricks. They wanted me to try the ramps that were easy for them to do. I got on Hannah's skooter and almost crashed right on my rear end a few times. I couldn't believe how hard those "easy" ramps were. I think my failures inspired Hannah to step out and risk a little bit more since it wasn't her favorite sport to do. ; )
We then had a play day with some public school friends at the park. It was great to see them again. During that time I was on facebook and saw Natalie Grant was offering free tickets to her concert "Dare To Be" to the first 10 people who emailed her. On a whim I emailed her and she actually put two aside for Hannah and I. So, we had a spontaneous mother/daughter date in Sacramento last night! It was wonderful!! Unfortunately, Hannah got car sick and had an accident on the way home. Poor thing. She felt horrible. I told her it wasn't her fault; we cleaned it up at a gas station on the side of the road. I was so thankful that God was watching out for us.
Now I am catching up on Women's Ministry stuff and Music Ministry stuff. = ) Life really is about the journey and not so much about the destination. Or, as I learned from Charlotte Gambill's message; it's how we handle the "middle" part of our lives that will make the biggest impact when we reach the end.
Tuesday, January 7, 2014
Break Time ~
Here are some pictures from our Christmas/New Year break. If you would like to watch my performances from "Light Your World," you can go to: http://www.westminster.org/media/ under Special Events December 2013
Tuesday, December 31, 2013
Lara, You Think Too Much ~
Ha ha. This is what I have been told by the people closest to me lately. Yes, they are right. I am very analytical by nature...to a fault. Everything has to have meaning; everything has to have purpose. This is how I spend most of my time; I try to figure things out. This trait of mine has slowly taken away some of my joy. During the Christmas break, I've had to come to terms with it and start from the ground up, with God's help, to find my joy again.
What is joy? Well, it is a much deeper expression of contentment and happiness. It mainly comes from the Lord. It says in scripture, "the JOY of the Lord is my strength." Nehemiah 8:10. Now, before I can fill more of my time being with the Lord, I need to create more margin in my day to find more "free time" to spend focused on the Lord. Vacations can be so healing sometimes because they have the potential to force us to stop and enjoy space.
Our family stayed home for Christmas and celebrated quietly together. It was a much needed break. During this time to breathe I have had the privilege of realizing what matters most to God and to me. My husband, Brian bought me two books, "David" and " Joseph" written by Charles Swindoll. I have identified with those bible characters the most and was excited to read them and pull out rich truth from their experiences to apply to my life. Spending time reading has sparked a little bit of hidden joy in me. I had forgotten how much I loved reading a good book. I also downloaded a devotional onto my Kindle (thanks Karen) ; ) called, "Known and Loved" 52 devotions from The Psalms. This has helped me get back into reading God's word every morning and remind me to talk to Him about everything. Because of this discovery, it has hit me that I need to have more time in my days to get away and read.
Second, Brian gave me space to spend a couple of hours in our bedroom doing a deep clean. I am a clutter freak. I save almost everything and it mostly ends up in our room. Because Brian gave me that uninterrupted time, I was able to create a haven to escape to when I want to read and spend quiet time with God. A weight was lifted off of my shoulders. ah____
Another learning moment I had was watching a sermon Andy Stanley did on "The One Thing." He said we each have one thing to work on this coming year, but we need to use a specific scripture verse to hold us accountable to that "one thing." The scripture verse was Nehemiah 6:3 "I am doing a good work and I can't come down." What does that mean? It means that we need to have a response to people, situations, and other distractions that will come into our lives that have the potential of taking us off course from that "one thing." Now for me, I have filled up my life with so many things that it is too difficult right now to trim them down to one thing. So I have five things to focus on this coming year. Everything else that does not go under those five categories needs to be put to the side. Hopefully, I will be able to trim that down even more, but until then, God will have to help me stick to this commitment. Those five things are:
1) Spending Time w/God - quiet time, devotions, worship, pray, read
2) My Family - family time, trips, teaching voice/piano (income), molly; our dog
3) Homeschool - teaching my kids, field trips, socializing
4) Music Ministry - worship leader at my church, Mom's Arise Conference, songwriting, singing
5) Women's Ministry - women's retreat, mother's day tea, promotion, recruitment, prayer
I don't know about you, but I am looking at these five things and am realizing that this list is way too much even still. Can you believe I have been doing more than these five things for the past six months? Crazy. No wonder I've lost my joy!
Lastly, I've had to face the social media phenomenon. I can't keep up on Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, YouTube, Blogging, and whatever else I am doing, anymore. It's silly, but this has torn me up inside more than anything else. I love being connected with people from my past and making new friends from all over the world. I love seeing if someone needs prayer and praying for them right then and there with all of the other prayer warriors who saw the post. I love reading about others lives and being inspired by them. I love reading about good deals on something that I can't pass up. Even though all of those things are very good, they are taking me away from the good work God has for me in those five things listed above. By pulling away, I'm afraid I might loose the relationships I've built over the years and fade away from people's memories. HOWEVER, since reading about David, God has shown me that it is His story I am in, not mine. He orchestrates everything for good. I do not need to worry about a thing. I just need to be faithful with what I can do and He will do the rest. So I am planning to not post very much on these sites. I will probably write on this blog more and post the link on the social media sites instead. My Facebook fan page will be more for sharing what God is leading me to do and what He has been speaking to my heart about. But, I don't want to share about what I am eating, or reading, or how my kids did something super funny, not because those are bad things to do, but because I am owning this verse in 2014, Nehemiah 6:3 "I am doing a good work and I can't come down."
Thank you for your understanding. If you would like to connect with me, this would be a better place to do that then on any of the social media sites. = ) I would love to hear from you.
God bless you in 2014!
Lara~
What is joy? Well, it is a much deeper expression of contentment and happiness. It mainly comes from the Lord. It says in scripture, "the JOY of the Lord is my strength." Nehemiah 8:10. Now, before I can fill more of my time being with the Lord, I need to create more margin in my day to find more "free time" to spend focused on the Lord. Vacations can be so healing sometimes because they have the potential to force us to stop and enjoy space.
Our family stayed home for Christmas and celebrated quietly together. It was a much needed break. During this time to breathe I have had the privilege of realizing what matters most to God and to me. My husband, Brian bought me two books, "David" and " Joseph" written by Charles Swindoll. I have identified with those bible characters the most and was excited to read them and pull out rich truth from their experiences to apply to my life. Spending time reading has sparked a little bit of hidden joy in me. I had forgotten how much I loved reading a good book. I also downloaded a devotional onto my Kindle (thanks Karen) ; ) called, "Known and Loved" 52 devotions from The Psalms. This has helped me get back into reading God's word every morning and remind me to talk to Him about everything. Because of this discovery, it has hit me that I need to have more time in my days to get away and read.
Second, Brian gave me space to spend a couple of hours in our bedroom doing a deep clean. I am a clutter freak. I save almost everything and it mostly ends up in our room. Because Brian gave me that uninterrupted time, I was able to create a haven to escape to when I want to read and spend quiet time with God. A weight was lifted off of my shoulders. ah____
Another learning moment I had was watching a sermon Andy Stanley did on "The One Thing." He said we each have one thing to work on this coming year, but we need to use a specific scripture verse to hold us accountable to that "one thing." The scripture verse was Nehemiah 6:3 "I am doing a good work and I can't come down." What does that mean? It means that we need to have a response to people, situations, and other distractions that will come into our lives that have the potential of taking us off course from that "one thing." Now for me, I have filled up my life with so many things that it is too difficult right now to trim them down to one thing. So I have five things to focus on this coming year. Everything else that does not go under those five categories needs to be put to the side. Hopefully, I will be able to trim that down even more, but until then, God will have to help me stick to this commitment. Those five things are:
1) Spending Time w/God - quiet time, devotions, worship, pray, read
2) My Family - family time, trips, teaching voice/piano (income), molly; our dog
3) Homeschool - teaching my kids, field trips, socializing
4) Music Ministry - worship leader at my church, Mom's Arise Conference, songwriting, singing
5) Women's Ministry - women's retreat, mother's day tea, promotion, recruitment, prayer
I don't know about you, but I am looking at these five things and am realizing that this list is way too much even still. Can you believe I have been doing more than these five things for the past six months? Crazy. No wonder I've lost my joy!
Lastly, I've had to face the social media phenomenon. I can't keep up on Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, YouTube, Blogging, and whatever else I am doing, anymore. It's silly, but this has torn me up inside more than anything else. I love being connected with people from my past and making new friends from all over the world. I love seeing if someone needs prayer and praying for them right then and there with all of the other prayer warriors who saw the post. I love reading about others lives and being inspired by them. I love reading about good deals on something that I can't pass up. Even though all of those things are very good, they are taking me away from the good work God has for me in those five things listed above. By pulling away, I'm afraid I might loose the relationships I've built over the years and fade away from people's memories. HOWEVER, since reading about David, God has shown me that it is His story I am in, not mine. He orchestrates everything for good. I do not need to worry about a thing. I just need to be faithful with what I can do and He will do the rest. So I am planning to not post very much on these sites. I will probably write on this blog more and post the link on the social media sites instead. My Facebook fan page will be more for sharing what God is leading me to do and what He has been speaking to my heart about. But, I don't want to share about what I am eating, or reading, or how my kids did something super funny, not because those are bad things to do, but because I am owning this verse in 2014, Nehemiah 6:3 "I am doing a good work and I can't come down."
Thank you for your understanding. If you would like to connect with me, this would be a better place to do that then on any of the social media sites. = ) I would love to hear from you.
God bless you in 2014!
Lara~
Friday, December 27, 2013
Who Are These People?
I am sitting in a Starbucks looking around me and I know no one. Who are these people? What are their stories? I see a family lounging in a group of cushy chairs on their IPhones. They use to be lost in their own books about a half an hour ago. They are not the only family here. Someone is studying right next to me. A dignified older couple is silently reading at a side table beside two windows. The baristas are younger guys probably high on caffeine and counting down the minutes before closing time. Some are speaking in English, others in Spanish. Some are laughing, others are tuning out the background noise. What are all their stories? Where did they come from? Where will they be going?
I feel lost in my own little world, hypnotized by the assortment of new age melodies overhead, but each time I look up I am hit hard with the reality that there is a whole other world full of people who were created by the God of the universe, just like me. Oh how I wish I could get to know their stories. I wish I could hug each one of them and tell them how much God loves them and values them or stand up and sing a song where God's Spirit would touch their souls. However, I can't. How awkward would that be? So I continue to sit in one of the corners of the inner wall, in my own little world, knowing I will be leaving soon to go back to where I came from, never to see these people again.
The people that surround me day after day inspire me to write and sing songs that point to a loving God who cares about every detail of our lives. I know God cares about each one of these people who have become apart of my life's story. I am not allowed to sing here in Starbucks, but I pray the songs I do have a chance to sing and write will give wing to the Holy Spirit's power, bringing those who hear to a deeper place with God.
Just some thoughts from this mom who sings... ; )
I feel lost in my own little world, hypnotized by the assortment of new age melodies overhead, but each time I look up I am hit hard with the reality that there is a whole other world full of people who were created by the God of the universe, just like me. Oh how I wish I could get to know their stories. I wish I could hug each one of them and tell them how much God loves them and values them or stand up and sing a song where God's Spirit would touch their souls. However, I can't. How awkward would that be? So I continue to sit in one of the corners of the inner wall, in my own little world, knowing I will be leaving soon to go back to where I came from, never to see these people again.
The people that surround me day after day inspire me to write and sing songs that point to a loving God who cares about every detail of our lives. I know God cares about each one of these people who have become apart of my life's story. I am not allowed to sing here in Starbucks, but I pray the songs I do have a chance to sing and write will give wing to the Holy Spirit's power, bringing those who hear to a deeper place with God.
Just some thoughts from this mom who sings... ; )
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